I know where the bodies are buried�

2002-10-03

I�ve either done a really stupid thing or a really smart thing. This morning, when I came in to work, one of my bosses, the one I trust more than I did a year ago told me I would be working for the finance department.

I looked at him and said, �No. If I have to work for finance, then I have to leave.� I didn�t really mean for that to come out of my mouth. But as I thought about it through the day, the more I realized that I meant it.

Slightly over a year ago they transferred me to accounting. I went, without argument. And have HATED IT ever since.

My company is an IPO. This is our first year. The whole company could live or die depending on the information I give. I don�t want that kind of pressure. The fact that the livelihoods of twenty people depend on me is quite enough pressure for me.

I like finding the answers to questions. I don�t like having to account for every last penny. My mind just doesn�t work that way.

One of the people from finance, my ostensible new boss, left a message for me this morning. �Call me. We have a new project that we think you would be perfect for.� Can you wait for the body to be cold and the mourners to have left the room before you start going through the pockets?

The last time someone made changes without asking me, I was unhappy with them. I never asked to be part of accounting and still don�t want to be part of accounting. If they think I�m going to leap every time they say �Frog�, they are miss-informed. I did that once to my own detriment and I�m not doing it again.

I�m still afraid that I said the wrong thing. I�m still afraid that I�ll lose my job. All in all, this has been a good company to work for. But they�ve changed the jobs of a few people besides me in the last year. Without asking them. Putting them in new jobs without ever asking them if they want to change their goals. If this is what my company has become, then I don�t want to work here any more. And I�m willing to say so. I did before and things changed. People can�t change their mistakes unless they know what they are.

This is a mistake. Finance has been running everything. And they�ve made mistakes. Now they�re trying to bury the bodies. I�m not willing to be buried alive.

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